Trystology Talk Podcast E10: Hot Monogamy

Hot Monogamy!

In Episode 10, Roylin talks “Hot Monogamy” with Marriage and Sex Therapist Dr. Megan Fleming. Dr. Fleming has been featured in Cosmo, Oprah, Men’s Health and more. Her motto is, “Become the happiest couple you know.”

But first, Have you had your orgasm today? Roylin forgot that she had! Funny thing, she couldn’t sleep at 1am after a busy day, and needed to have help going to sleep, so out came the toys! How about you?

Heard in the store this week: Two women read the sign outside the store, ‘For Love and Passion,” and exclaimed that they needed some of that! They came into the store, giggling, and searching for love and passion! They found it! Yay!

Megan and Roylin discuss her philosophy that couples should avoid comparing their relationship with that of other couples. Work on creating what’s hot for you and your partner. It takes conscious effort, and Megan suggests role playing, fantasy, and other ideas to keep engaged with your partner. With statistics that show intercourse frequency with your partner at just 1x per month or less constitutes a sexless marriage, Megan and Roylin strive to encourage couples to engage in conscious interaction. This can be in the form of touch and massage, the introduction of a sex toy, or with simple conversation and engagement. Communication is key for partners to share their desires, needs, and wants. This is important because it is known that most couples aren’t necessarily matched on their drive. There needs to be respect and negotiation on frequency, and it is interesting to note that the person with the lower sex drive is in control. It’s just the way it is.

Another fun analogy is that some couples aren’t even on the dance floor together, and that we need to bring them back onto the dance floor so that they can even engage. We discussed hibernation in Episode 8, so that played a bit into getting individuals out of hibernation, and onto the dance floor.

Roylin and Megan will meet again to discuss her new book Invisible Divorce. Until then, enjoy reconnecting with your partners!

You can check out Dr. Megan Fleming’s new book here

Invisible Divorce Book